A Quest!

Just tonight, I realized my mission. I have a daughter who is 18, and I have never actually met her in person (long story) and when she was 16, she found me on myspace!
She was depressed at the time, and I was so happy to be there...if even if only on the internet and over the telephone. It was wonderful to know my daughter thought about me, and sought me out and FOUND ME! I have never been given the chance to actually be in her life, and I have always wanted to be! She is in Ohio also, and at the time she found me I was living in Vermont.....and I was also very depressed. She gave me strength, and a reason to get myself together...and I moved back to Ohio to meet her.
Unfortunately after I got here, it was very hard to find a job, and it took me a while to get back on my feet. Her myspace profile is now un-visited...and I call her number, and it's disconnected....and I write her mom and get a nasty message about my daughter knowing that I'm "not really her father"...and now I have lost all contact with her. Life can be so unfair sometimes....

Well....I am going to try to get back in contact with my daughter some how, and I am going to introduce her to her REAL grand-mother...and great-grandmother!

I can't think of a more noble quest!

The Times, They Are A-Changin'

The more I learn about my family, and our family history....the more proud I am to be part of the family! Getting to know my Mother, I realize a lot of what makes me ME, came from my Mother..and from our family blood. My mother is a very caring and loving person, and she is also creative. When we talked about what we were good in school at....she said she didn't like math....(just like me) and she loved Creative Writing.
My mom is a LOT like me, and we have not actually met! This is magic stuff!

I want to thank my mother for my creativity, compassion, and my love of the arts!
It is tuly an honor to be Blasdel!

Here is a web page I just made last night that has words that really fit my life right now: "The Times, They Are A-Changin'"

A bad day...

This morning I was chatting on FaceBook with a very close old friend who I have not heard from in years! This is a good thing.... but I then found out that one of our group of friends is no longer with us. My friends were both in the military, and our friend, Rick Black, went to war right after 9/11 and saw some serious "action". After he returned he was not the same, and he did not receive the help he should have....and ended up taking his own life.

Back in the day, Rick was the strongest, and probably the smartest person in our circle of friends... war truly must be hell!!
I am having a hard time with this....life is so not fair!!!!

Rest in peace Rick, my old friend... until we meet again!

"I have seen my brothers, in ashes on the ground. Maybe in a new life, we can turn this thing around!"

Wandering Scribe

When I first started "blogging" I found a blog that was being written by a homeless person living in her car. I have been following her blog, and have seen her get herself out of her rut by blogging, and being the type of person who is creative and determined. She inspired me! There is currently a poem she posted on her blog that seems very fitting for my situation with my newly-found family. Speaking with my mother on the phone last night, I realized I got my creative and artistic nature from her! This one is for you, mom!

Sonnet to Orpheus

Oh you gentle ones, every once in a while step
into the breath that is indifferent to you,
let it be parted on your cheeks,
behind you it trembles, reunited.

Oh you blessed ones, oh you whole ones,
you who seem to be the beginning of the hearts.
Bow of arrows and target of arrows,
your smile beams eternally with tears.

Do not fear to suffer the heaviness,
give it back to earth's weight:
heavy are the mountains. Heavy are the oceans.
Even what you planted as children,
the trees, have long become too heavy;
you could not carry them.
But the breezes... but the spaces...

Read the blog here: Wandering Scribe

Uncle Steve

Yesterday I went over to my Uncle Steve's house and took over a couple guitars and my practice amp. This is the first face to face, actual meeting with anyone in my biological family! Steve, you have inspired me already in more ways than you can possibly know! For instance, thank you for taking me into the "jazz" zone!!....I still feel very unsure trying to play Jazz....it is a totally different way of looking at music! I am now very interested in jazz though, and we need a bass player next time we jam!
This is very interesting because....when I was much younger, one of my friends was great piano player...but he was classically trained...and when I first tried to get him to "jam" he asked me...."where is the sheet music?" I had to take him into the "zone" of just "jamming" ...and after a while we were writing songs together, and "jamming" at parties and such...
Ironically, I feel the same way he must have back then...I have been playing cover songs in bar bands for many years now, and when we were playing in Uncle Steve's basement, I was thinking.... "I need to learn some of this jazz stuff!"....or "where is the sheet music?" !!! It was awesome "jammin" with you Uncle Steve!

Life has really been coming around full circle for me lately!

I am looking forward to meeting more of my family!

Uncle Steve ROCKS!!! :-)

Halloween!

As it approaches the witching hour on Halloween.. it has truly been a magical night!

First I would like to pay my respects to my adopted father, Ralph T. Bechter, who passed away in 1998...Halloween is his birthday! I feel your spirit tonight dad....

I also received a call from my actual Grandmother for the very first time while driving home, right after I passed the Haunted Schoolhouse, and The Haunted Laboratory, which I drive past every day on my way home from work! On Halloween!!! Coincidence!?
(Her birthday is also the day after mine too...lol)
I could NOT make stuff like this up!!!!

I also spoke with two of my long-lost uncles tonight for the first time, and found I also have a relative who also has a birthday tonight...Halloween!



Halloween.... WOW!!!

Here is to the ones who are no longer here!
...and to the ones re-united!

John

Wow!

So far, I have talked with my mother twice on the telephone, and I have received messages and emails from other newly-found relatives. I have also spoken with my Aunt Connie on the phone, and my "Step-Father" ...This is AWESOME, but a bit overwhelming...I am not used to having a big family, and this will take some getting used to!

In the mean time, please don't hold it against me if I can't keep all of you straight...like who is my uncle, brother, cousin...etc.

Thank you Aunt Jeannee for this picture, this is the first photo I have ever seen of my mother!



I feel very welcomed in my new family! Thank you all for being so cool!

Now I have to go to work.... but please stop by this blog, and make comments and posts...I wanna know everything about all of you!

Johnny
(I am embracing my new name!)